Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened.
Happiness never decreases by being shared.
-Buddha
I’ve been a yoga teacher for almost seven
years now and it’s probably safe to say that I’ve had over a thousand students
cross my path. It’s also true that
I rarely forget a face or a story, although the chances that I’ll remember a
name are getting slimmer. But
there are those students whose presence in my life and heart becomes so
powerful that I have to wonder who is the teacher and who is the student? I met Michelle “Sue” Woodall at
the University of Arizona (UA) Cancer Center the summer of 2009 in my yoga class for those touched by
cancer. Sue, who attended class
faithfully with her friend Pat, had been diagnosed in 2007 with stage 4 lung
cancer. When diagnosed, she had a
collapsed lung, and was told that she was terminal and there was no hope. Because Sue was a feisty and positive
person with a supportive and loving family as well as many friends at her side
she chose to fight this diagnosis and try a relatively new treatment utilizing
pinpoint radiation and was able to restore much of her lung function. She continued to receive chemotherapy
and went on with her life, getting the “all clear” in 2009 with very little non-metabolic cancer remaining.
Receiving a cancer diagnosis can be
a special kind of hell and those undergoing treatment not only cope with the
disease, but also many side-effects that can often feel worse than the illness
itself. Many patients spend one or more days a week at the cancer center some
for many hours as they weave their way from doctor’s appointments to laboratory
tests to the infusion room where chemotherapy is administered or to the
radiation treatment areas. A patient’s companions and family members are also
walking along side their loved ones on the seemingly endless road to healing and
the days can be long. Often
depression, anxiety, and fear can accompany this journey.
In 2010 Dr. Weiss, a physician at the
cancer center, who knew of Sue’s beading interest, suggested that she start a
beading project for the other patients.
She readily agreed but had no ideas, and no plan and more importantly,
no funding. So, along with her
daughter Connie Joslin, who was living nearby, she began showing up on Monday
mornings from 9:00am-12:00pm with a box of her own beads and a willingness to
serve.
Sue had been a school- teacher for 40
years in the Amphi district middle-schools so she knew a few things about
making things happen and also about wrangling people. Connie has reflected to
me that this project was Sue’s “baby” that she loved it with a great passion
and was able to use her greatest teaching skills in this setting. The maintenance crew would set up a few
tables and Connie and Sue would bring beads and tools, sit down and start
beading. When a patient or family
member stopped by they would offer supplies, gentle encouragement, a listening
ear, and a place to wait in-between chemotherapy treatments, doctor’s
appointments, and radiation.
I sat with Connie and her friend Sue Barrett (“Sue B.”), also a cancer
survivor, who participates weekly in the beading project, for a few delightful hours last week at their shared home to talk
more about Sue’s beading project. And I would like to share
this with you now.
Initially Sue, Connie and Denise, Sue’s
Daughter-in-law, bought, begged, and borrowed, beads for the project. They began to scavenge for costume
jewelry at garage sales, estate sales, second-hand stores and to contact
friends for unused pieces. Connie
says that she spent many hours at her kitchen table carefully taking pieces
apart so that patients and their families could create one-of-a-kind pieces of
jewelry for themselves or their loved ones while they waited for treatment.
Eventually UA established a budget for
the Beading Project that has continued to grow in popularity. Many people, both patients and they’re
companions came to the beading table on a regular basis. “Beading can show them
another part of themselves that is not defined by cancer, or by drugs, another
part of themselves that is creative, beautiful, and can be enlightening” Said Connie. Many patients, after developing some
basic design skills, make gifts for their friends and family members. Many folks will come to the beading
table, start a project, go to their treatment or doctor’s appointment and then
return later to finish their project. In the end though, it’s not just
about the jewelry being created, it’s about relationships and building trust
with others who know what you are going through, says Sue B., “Beading can
create a change to bond with others who are going through similar things” and
this can make all the difference.
The project took a big hit, when Sue died in August of 2012. Her lung cancer had resurged and not even
this pure brightly lit soul could beat it. It happened quickly and those of us left behind were
stunned and heartbroken. It didn’t seem possible that one so filled with hope,
optimism, love, kindness, joy, and peace could be taken. Personally, I had experienced a true and
unconditional love from Sue, the kind that we feel so rarely in this
world. Sue was one who helped me
feel both lovable and worthy and I knew that she did this for every person that
crossed her path. There is no greater legacy than this. When she died there were a number of us,
her friends and family, who felt desolate. I, for one, did not want to continue teaching my yoga class
without her laughing Buddha like presence. However, at the memorial service we had for her, I could
feel her pushing me from beyond.
At the next few classes a remarkable thing happened. New people who had
never met Sue flooded into the class “This class has such a good feeling”, “I heard about this class, a woman
named Sue told me about it”, “Thank God you are here, I really need this class
right now”, “The beading lady told me to come try yoga”. We continued on, smiling beneath the
tears, but knowing that our mission to support persons with cancer was needed
more than ever.
Meanwhile, the Beading Project also had
it’s faltering moments without Sue’s leadership and was temporarily shut down
while new volunteers became “official” in the eyes of the UMC organization,
necessary, but not necessarily easy.
It was tough especially for Connie who was grieving her mom
intensively. But she knew it was
important both for her own healing, and also for the patients and their
families who had grown to depend on this Monday morning project. Connie was
able to resurrect the Beading Project primarily with the help of Harriet Hutchins, who had
been one of Sue’s dearest friends for over 35 years and states that she wouldn't have been able to do it without Harriet (pictured below).
Although they were able to keep the beading doors open, the dedicated funding had ceased so they were back to searching high and low for any spare bead to keep the project afloat. But Connie, Harriet, Kris Meyer, Connie’s husband Tim, and a number of other’s felt it was important to honor Sue’s legacy and to serve the patients who would continue to need love and care through their illness and treatment.
Although they were able to keep the beading doors open, the dedicated funding had ceased so they were back to searching high and low for any spare bead to keep the project afloat. But Connie, Harriet, Kris Meyer, Connie’s husband Tim, and a number of other’s felt it was important to honor Sue’s legacy and to serve the patients who would continue to need love and care through their illness and treatment.
Why do people love this project so much
that it has grown from one table and a few people to many tables and a
veritable horde some weeks? According
to Connie, “Beading helps people take their
minds off their treatment and everything they’re going through. It gives them shared camaraderie.” Sitting at the beading table can give a
conversational opening that sitting in a waiting room chair wouldn’t. “Beading can be a safe outlet for
expressing what you’re going through, or even an escape.”
Connie mentioned that when she shares time
with those in treatment that she always emphasizes their healing, the present
moment, and that she will see them next week. I know that Connie would love to see you next week too.
For
more information on how to donate beads, money or your skill and expertise to
the Beading Project please see the information below.
Have a wonderful hope-filled week,
Namaste,
Felicia
To Donate Beads, Beading Supplies,
or Gifts of Money to the UA Cancer Center Please:
1) Drop
off CLEARLY LABELED beads and supplies to the front desk of the cancer center
for Beading Project,
Attention: Lynn Barwick If you are someone who loves to
frequent thrift shops and garage sales, please keep this project in mind!
University of Arizona Cancer Center
3838 N. Campbell Avenue
Tucson, AZ 85719
2) To
donate gifts of money to the Beading Project please send checks made out to
Lynn Barwick with “Beading Project”
clearly written on the check, and include a note stating your intention
for funds to be used for this project.
Lynn Gransie Barwick, LCSW
Oncology Social WorkerUniversity of Arizona Cancer Center
3838 N. Campbell Avenue
Tucson, AZ 85719
(520) 694-1855
3) Send
prepaid gift cards from Tucson area stores that sell beads and beading supplies,
Michaels, Joann Crafts, and other retailers to Lynn Barwick, again noting
clearly in your correspondence that these are intended to be used for the
Beading Project.
4) Office
Supplies are always needed too: Sharpies, plastic storage bins with lids, tape,
etc.
5) Show
up on a Monday morning to participate or find out more how you can help. Ask for Connie Joslin, Sue Barrett, or
Harriet Hutchins any Monday between 9:00am-12:00pm
Thanks for the clarifications Connie. Your mother drew in many people who were dedicated both to her and to her vision of caring for others when they are experiencing times of stress and anxiety. Your entire community of family and friends becoming family are an inspiration to all of us who have the joy of interacting with you. Thank you all, for all you do.
ReplyDeleteOne bead at a time...one life at a time...one smile at a time...every act of kindness carries so much power. Something tells me they will have more beads than they'll know what to do with! What a beautiful life story.
ReplyDeleteLeslie, I hope they get a lot of beads! It's my understanding that they barely can keep enough in stock from week to week. Hey everybody!!!! Send Beads! And many thanks for doing so.
ReplyDelete